Girl Scout Cookie Week: Chewy Samoa Bars

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I’m starting Girl Scout Re-Do week the best way I know how. With Samoas.

Coconut, chocolate, buttery goodness. I swear I could eat a whole box if left to my own devices. In fact, I’m pretty sure I have somewhere around 6th grade when we stored boxes and boxes of cookies in our garage.

It was nothing for me to sneak out, grab a box and quickly split it with my sisters. Or not. They were my absolute favorite treat, something I looked forward to for months and months.

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It’s probably the only reason I joined the Girl Scouts in the first place.

As I grew up and learned more about nutrition, I quickly realized that as delicious as these cookies were, they are far from being remotely healthy.

WTF Girl Scouts?

I kinda want to help support your mission. I really don’t want to buy your cookies in order to do so.

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Yeah, yeah, I know the moderation speech. A dream defense for every food company.

I don’t care that there’s sugar and fat in them, they are cookies and I expect that. My cookies have a little bit of sugar and fat in them and I occasionally eat those if I want a sweet treat.

I’m more upset by the quality of ingredients. Partially hydrogenated oils, hydrogenated oils, palm oil, high fructose corn syrup, and artificial flavors. With more than 20% daily value for saturated fat, you’re going to have to do better than moderation to convince me to indulge in these.

Because let’s be real. It won’t be one cookie. It will be 4. And then 8. And then I will need a new soap box ; )

girl scout cookie samosa chewy bars

Blah. No need. Instead, I topped my favorite coconut-date bars with melted chocolate and toasted coconut. Now we’re talking. I used butterscotch chips for a cookie flavor but brown sugar will work just as well.

Unprocessed, coconut, chocolate goodness. Call me Girl Scouts, I’ll put my cookies against yours any day.

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Chewy Samoa Bars

½ cup pitted and chopped dates
1/3 cup raw cashews
¼ cup raw almonds
3 tbsp shredded, unsweetened coconut
3 tbsp. butterscotch chips (can sub brown sugar)

1/4 cup toasted coconut (see below)
1/4 cup chocolate chips
1 tsp. neutral oil

Place dates, cashews, 3 tbsp. coconut, almonds, and butterscotch chips (or brown sugar) in the bowl of a food processor or blender. Process together until very crumbly. It should stick together if you press it between your fingers. Be careful not to over process that it doesn’t turn into butter.

Press into a brownie pan for desired thickness of your bars. It won’t take up an entire  8X8 pan. Place in the fridge until firm, about 30 minutes.

Toast coconut (from Bon Appetit) Preheat oven to 350ºF. Spread unsweetened coconut shavings, or sweetened shredded or flaked coconut on a rimmed baking sheet and bake, stirring once or twice, until golden, about 5 to 10 minutes. If toasting sweetened coconut, check and stir more frequently because the added sugar causes irregular browning

Combine chocolate chips and neutral oil in a microwave safe bowl. Heat for 1 minute. Remove and stir until creamy.

Drizzle or spread onto date-coconut bars. Top with toasted coconut. Refrigerate until firm.

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